Elizabeth ‘Betsy’ Howie

FALLS  VILLAGE — Elizabeth “Betsy” Howie, of Falls Village, passed away on November 25, 2022, with her beloved daughter, Calpurnia “Callie” Carter, at her side. She was 60 years old. A cherished member of the Falls Village community known for her wit, warmth and outspokenness, Betsy was also a longtime resident of New York City where she worked with aplomb in the theater and publishing worlds.

Born in Ann Arbor, Michigan, on June 6, 1962, to Mary Lou Howie and Charles R. Howie, Betsy grew up in Grand Rapids, Michigan with her older brothers, Tim and Randy Howie. Betsy attended Northview High School where she swam competitively. As a teenager participating in community theater, she discovered her life’s joy and passion, and made some of her closest, lifelong friends.

After graduating from high school, Betsy moved to New York City where she attended New York University and studied acting at the renowned Stella Adler Studio. As a young woman, Betsy’s friends, habits, and jobs all revolved around her number one priority: theater. She worked as part of many repertory theaters. Her passion for theater paired with a gift for writing.

She wrote the book for “Cowgirls,” a musical that she also performed in, which was staged across the country. When “Cowgirls” opened Off Broadway in 1996, The New York Times reviewer called it a “joyous slapstick hoedown.” In 1987, Betsy produced and performed in Caryl Churchill’s “Top Girls” with fellow staff members from Phebe’s bar on the Bowery, at the nearby New Theater. Betsy worked at Phebe’s—which was an East Village staple serving cops, actors, and what Betsy called “all the usual suspects”—as a bartender and waitress on roller skates.

Betsy was a prolific writer. During her life, she wrote numerous books, including a humorous memoir, “Callie’s Tally: An Accounting of Baby’s First Year (Or, What My Daughter Owes Me),” and the novel “Snow. She also wrote many children’s books under the pen name, Howie Dewin.

As a young adult in New York City, Betsy lived in the East Village and in various neighborhoods in Brooklyn. In addition to waitressing and acting, she took on a wide range of odd jobs: a nanny for the Mayor of New York City, an assistant to Stella Adler, an organizer of the re-opening of Ellis Island, and a one-time speechwriter for Ronald Reagan. She also worked for environmental causes which were another one of her lifelong passions.

Beginning in college, Betsy loved to ride her bike around New York City. In 2015, when she and Calpurnia got an apartment in the Bronx, Betsy would commute by bicycle to her job at Scholastic Book Clubs in Manhattan. Betsy began working as a freelancer at Scholastic in 1994 and became a full time staff member in 1999.

Betsy gave birth in 2001 to her only daughter, Calpurnia, whose father is the playwright and longtime Falls Village resident Lonnie Carter. Betsy raised Calpurnia in Falls Village, and when Calpurnia was 14, they began dividing their time between Falls Village and the Bronx, commuting back and forth every week for years. They made both places their home.

Betsy moved to Falls Village on a whim, surprising her co-workers one Monday morning when she announced that she had bought a farmhouse in a small town in rural northwestern Connecticut. Betsy is thought of by her friends and family as being “fearless,” and the move out of the city was a move out of her comfort zone—but one that was well worth it. Betsy became an active and loving member of the Falls Village community, working on the Board of Education, Recreation Commission, and performing as the long-time live-auction host at the David M. Hunt Library. She also contributed her theater talents as the acting coach at Housatonic Valley Regional High School. Betsy founded and operated for about a year the Falls Village Marshmallow Company, which was a testament to her love of marshmallows. Falls Village became one of Betsy’s greatest comforts, especially in the last three years, after she was diagnosed with cancer. The community became her family.

Betsy loved building things. She constructed sheds for both herself and her late mother, and a playhouse for Calpurnia. She was known for her love of simple food, reminding her friends who cooked for her that she was Lutheran, and therefore had “white-bread taste”.

Betsy took great pride in her extensive work constructing a very detailed family tree, using Ancestry.com. Her focus on this project allowed her to combine her incredible creativity with her intense intelligence.

She also had a deep love for Frankfort, Michigan, where her family owned a summer home that her grandfather built. The house was a staple of her childhood, and her daughter’s. Her affection for Lake Michigan remained strong in her heart throughout her life.

Betsy had great respect for animals. She was known to have cats walk up to her house, or jump in her car, and immediately become a part of her family. She had many cats throughout her life, in addition to a rabbit and a few dogs.

Betsy had many, many friends. She had a beautiful way of gathering people from all walks of life and holding them close over long periods of time. She was absolutely loveable, and completely full of empathy and kindness. She was nurturing, smart, creative, selfless, happy, and hilarious.

Betsy’s greatest accomplishment and love was Calpurnia. They were two peas in a pod, and Betsy’s last few years of life were spent in complete peace with Calpurnia by her side.

What wasn’t Betsy? She wasn’t dishonest, selfish, and she wasn’t disloyal. Witness the outpouring of love and affection from all corners of the land — a testament to her brilliance, kindness, and amazing good humor.

Betsy is survived by her daughter, Calpurnia, her brothers Randy and Tim Howie, her sister Sarah Howie, her step-mother Wendy, her daughter’s father/true friend Lonnie Carter, her future daughter-in-law Dee Dee Davis, her cats Isa and Bo, and her grand-dog Darla.

A memorial service will be held on Saturday, Dec. 10, at 11 a.m., at Trinity Lime Rock Episcopal Church. The service will be live streamed on the church’s website at trinitylimerock.org. In lieu of flowers, please send donations to the Falls Village Volunteer Fire Department at PO Box 1, Falls Village CT, 06031.