Part one of a focus on coping with a difficult boss appeared in the Nov. 18 issue. This week’s column expands the list.
It is very frustrating to work for someone who tells you what to do … every step of the way. He or she manages at the detail level, allowing little latitude in how you do your job. Such bosses stifle creativity and initiative. While their behavior may reflect distrust in others’ judgment, it is often the case that they are well-intended, but hampered by perfectionism and a compelling need to avoid mistakes.
Coping strategy: Try telling your boss how his or her management style makes you feel. Convey in a calm and reasoned manner that managing closely makes you feel mistrusted in being able to do your job without close scrutiny. Importantly though, you need to demonstrate that you are competent enough to be empowered.
The taxing boss who creates unnecessary work
This type is related to the preceding from the standpoint of his or her perfectionism. Such a boss goes overboard in directing staff to examine every angle of a problem before making a decision. The result is a burdensome workload that often leads to unnecessary stress.
Coping strategy: Make a list of your deadlines and ask your boss to help you set priorities, emphasizing that the extra work will prevent you from meeting these deadlines. If possible, try reasoning with your boss, pointing out how further efforts are not apt to lead to an appreciable payoff.
The ethically challenged boss
Not all unprincipled behavior is of the magnitude of some of the unethical business practices that have been in the news in recent years.With increased pressure to squeeze out as much profit as possible, some are inclined to reinterpret the definition of right and wrong. So what do you do when your boss directs you to do something that is unethical, particularly when you perceive your job to be at stake?
Coping strategy: There is a fine line between being a victim of and participant in unethical behavior. Once you follow an unethical directive, you are a party to it. Experts recommend that you raise your concerns with your boss in a non-accusatory manner. Put in writing, your understanding of the discussion. If he or she does not back off, you are advised to go above your boss … to the board of directors as a last resort. In most cases, internal whistle-blowers are protected legally from retaliation.
The boss who solicits and ignores staff’s ideas
A common complaint that I hear is, “There’s no point in sharing my views, he just pays lip service.â€
A case in point: The president of a company hired a chief operating officer, although serious concerns were raised by senior staff who interviewed him (including myself who conducted a pre-hire assessment). In dismissing the concerns, the CEO indicated that, “I had a good feeling about Joe during an early morning jog.†Despite the male bonding, Joe was fired a year later after alienating almost everyone he worked with.
Coping strategy: Such a boss does not like being second-guessed, particularly when they feel strongly about something. The best approach is to make your case in a compelling manner, followed up in writing to protect yourself. In the end, your boss will be held accountable.
While working for a difficult boss can be challenging, it does not have to dominate your working life.
Some general guidelines to help you cope include:
• Calmly communicate your feelings and concerns, tempering strong emotions so that your boss listens rather than becoming defensive.
• Convey respect for your boss — but for yourself as well. Expect to be treated decently.
• Document problems/concerns in writing to protect your reputation.
• Recognize when to seek others’ help (e.g. senior management, human resources, legal counsel).
While you should not expect to change your boss, you can look out for your best interests and make the relationship more tolerable. In the end, you will have more positive energy to channel.
Danella Schiffer, Ph.D., is an industrial/organizational psychologist who resides in Salisbury and works nationally, with organizations and individuals. She can be reached at danella.schiffer@att.net.
