Yes, we’re all afraid. And that’s just making everyone more so

Checking out at LaBonne’s the other day, I noticed something for the first time. It wasn’t how quickly social distancing caught on, or how common it is now to see people wearing gloves.

It was fear. In people’s eyes. In their actions, ranging from nervous glances to deer-in-the-headlights panic.

Walking up the sidewalk to the pharmacy, FDR’s famous line “...the only thing we have to fear is fear itself” ran through my mind. Don’t we wish?

You bet we’re afraid. But that day at the store, for the first time, the fear was palpable.

Some folks furtively wrenched their carts — practically lifting the wheels off the floor — when a fellow shopper came too close. They moved as fast and as far away as possible (and that’s no mean feat at LaBonne’s.)

I said a polite “excuse me” meeting another customer awkwardly at a corner. She looked at me with equal parts alarm and suspicion, then scurried off. No one smiled, said hi, or bantered the way we sometimes do standing with a stranger in the cereal aisle.

So what caused everyone to clam up, avert their eyes, not even offer that universal look of shared sympathy?

The 24-hour drumbeat of dreadful news? Sure. Mounting anger over how this mess was so mind-bogglingly mishandled? Uh-huh.

But it also felt closer to home. Then I thought about various safety measures the still-open businesses downtown had been steadily adding over the past few weeks.  Every few days a new one showed up. All very necessary and all very visible.

And to some, pretty scary.

LaBonne’s cashiers were among the first to wear gloves. Next came Plexiglas barriers at the checkouts and customers were told not to bring their own bags (just when we were getting the hang of it!).

Salisbury Pharmacy had us come in the back door and limited the number of customers inside at one time. The post office door had a sign asking customers to stand 6 feet apart. A Plexiglas screen at the counter went up last week.

Naturally no one complained — indeed, each new precaution was welcomed. Yet, with everything else, it had subtly stoked people’s fear.

So, since that’s not going to magically go away either, here’s a thought: Assuming most of us are being as careful, as informed, as thoughtful and as safe as can be, what more can we do to show that to our neighbors? That we’re all working toward the same goal.

So, say hi to someone at the grocery store. Stand and talk to a friend on the sidewalk — 6 feet apart. No one will see your smile behind a mask, but it’ll show in your eyes. Try your best to not look afraid so someone else might feel the same, even for a moment.

Above all, tell the employees at those still-open businesses thank you. They deserve all the credit in the world for doing their jobs with enthusiasm, grace, patience and bravery. If they can face this by coming to work each day — and say “hello” to boot ­— so can we.

And if that sounds Pollyanna-ish, I don’t care.

 

Anne Longley was a Lakeville Journal reporter/editor from 1988-1991, later writing for national publications. She has been a full-time antiques dealer for the last 23 years and lives in Salisbury.

Latest News

Robert J. Pallone

NORFOLK — Robert J. Pallone, 69, of Perkins St. passed away April 12, 2024, at St. Vincent Medical Center. He was a loving, eccentric CPA. He was kind and compassionate. If you ever needed anything, Bob would be right there. He touched many lives and even saved one.

Bob was born Feb. 5, 1955 in Torrington, the son of the late Joesph and Elizabeth Pallone.

Keep ReadingShow less
The artistic life of Joelle Sander

"Flowers" by the late artist and writer Joelle Sander.

Cornwall Library

The Cornwall Library unveiled its latest art exhibition, “Live It Up!,” showcasing the work of the late West Cornwall resident Joelle Sander on Saturday, April 13. The twenty works on canvas on display were curated in partnership with the library with the help of her son, Jason Sander, from the collection of paintings she left behind to him. Clearly enamored with nature in all its seasons, Sander, who split time between her home in New York City and her country house in Litchfield County, took inspiration from the distinctive white bark trunks of the area’s many birch trees, the swirling snow of Connecticut’s wintery woods, and even the scenic view of the Audubon in Sharon. The sole painting to depict fauna is a melancholy near-abstract outline of a cow, rootless in a miasma haze of plum and Persian blue paint. Her most prominently displayed painting, “Flowers,” effectively builds up layers of paint so that her flurry of petals takes on a three-dimensional texture in their rough application, reminiscent of another Cornwall artist, Don Bracken.

Keep ReadingShow less
A Seder to savor in Sheffield

Rabbi Zach Fredman

Zivar Amrami

On April 23, Race Brook Lodge in Sheffield will host “Feast of Mystics,” a Passover Seder that promises to provide ecstasy for the senses.

“’The Feast of Mystics’ was a title we used for events back when I was running The New Shul,” said Rabbi Zach Fredman of his time at the independent creative community in the West Village in New York City.

Keep ReadingShow less