Thank you!
Your support is sustaining the future of local news in our communities.

Un-American activities

Soccer and the metric system — two ideas that never got off the ground in America. Ever wonder why?

Soccer requires constant movement by all of the participants, an un-American concept. Our two most popular sports in this country allow some or all of the players to sort of loll around at least part of the time. Soccer does not.

Baseball and football require bursts of energy when the ball is snapped or batted. Then everybody gets to stop and catch their breath. Soccer is just run, run, run. You’ve got to really be in shape for that. Another un-American idea.

When I was a kid they introduced soccer into our sports program. It was a sad sight. We just didn’t have the ball handling experience that foreign kids had from the time they were old enough to stand upright. Our players would run up to kick, miss the ball completely and the force of the kick would upend them, leaving them flat on their backs while the opposing team ran over them like a herd of stampeding cattle. We did not win a single game.

I guess soccer is doing better these days. It is not too expensive, equipment-wise, and the head injuries are not quite as severe as American football.

    u    u    u

The metric system could never be successful in a country that refers to large objects as “so many football fields in length.â€� Football fields are measured in yards, not meters. The good old English system  has a different, clear-cut name for each different unit of measurement. It’s not deci-yards or centi-yards. It’s inches and feet and yards and miles.

The last time I checked, the New York Thruway still had one last surviving sign from the attempt to go metric. It is a sign denoting kilometers to Buffalo near Syracuse, N.Y.  It has been peppered with shot gun blasts. America has spoken.

For years they tried, but the general population just kept on asking how far that would be in real miles.

Bob and Doug Mackenzie (Rick Moranis and Dave Thomas), from Second City Television, used to offer metric conversion help in their Great White North comedy skit. Being Canadian, they had grown up with metrics, but were often a bit fuzzy on the conversion to English measurement. It seemed to them that Americans would jump at it since, according to their formula, you simply doubled the number and added six, sort of like Fahrenheit to centigrade.

So then a six pack of Molsen’s would be doubled and add six would be 15 beers in a metric six pack. Who wouldn’t love that?

At least they never tried to foist those annoying foreign police sirens on us.

Bill Abrams resides in Pine Plains.

Latest News

Sharon Audubon Birdfest

Sharon Audubon Center naturalist and volunteer coordinator Bethany Sheffer shows off Mandala, a red-tailed hawk who lost an eye after being hit by a car more than a decade ago.

Alec Linden

SHARON – Drizzle and chill couldn’t quell bird enthusiasts Saturday, May 9, for the Sharon Audubon Center’s Birdfest, an all-out avian fete in celebration of World Migratory Bird Day.

The internationally recognized effort is meant to bring awareness to the safety and wellbeing of the billions of migratory birds that return to their summer breeding grounds each spring.

Keep ReadingShow less
Sharon voters reject controversial school budget, 114-99

The May 8 town meeting and budget vote were moved from Sharon Town Hall to Sharon Center School to accommodate what officials said was the largest turnout for a Sharon budget meeting in recent years.

Alec Linden

SHARON – More than 200 residents packed the Sharon Center School gymnasium Friday, May 8, where voters narrowly rejected the Sharon Board of Education's proposed 2026-2027 spending plan by a vote of 114-99, sending the budget back to the Board of Finance after weeks of heated debate over school funding.

The rejected proposal – the ninth version of the budget since deliberations began months ago – carried a bottom line of $4,165,513 for the elementary school, unchanged from last year. The flat budget came after the BOF ordered the BOE in early April to remove nearly $70,000 from its spending plan.

Keep ReadingShow less

Liane McGhee

Liane McGhee
Liane McGhee
Liane McGhee

Liane McGhee, a woman defined by her strength of will, generosity, and unwavering devotion to her family, passed away leaving a legacy of love and cherished memories.

Born Liane Victoria Conklin on May 27, 1957, in Sharon, CT, she grew up on Fish Street in Millerton, a place that remained close to her heart throughout her life. A proud graduate of the Webutuck High School Class of 1975, Liane soon began the most significant chapter of her life when she married Bill McGhee on August 7, 1976. Together, they built a life centered on family and shared values.

Keep ReadingShow less
google preferred source

Want more of our stories on Google? Click here to make us a Preferred Source.

‘Women Laughing’ celebrates New Yorker cartoonists

Ten New Yorker cartoonists gather around a table in a scene from “Women Laughing.”

Eric Korenman

There is something deceptively simple about a New Yorker cartoon. A few lines, a handful of words — usually fewer than a dozen — and suddenly an entire worldview has been distilled into a single panel.

There is also something delightfully subversive about watching a room full of women sit around a table drawing them. Not necessarily because it seems unusual now — thankfully — but because “Women Laughing,” screening May 9 at The Moviehouse in Millerton, reminds us that for much of The New Yorker’s history, such a gathering would have been nearly impossible to imagine.

Keep ReadingShow less

By any other name: becoming Lena Hall

By any other name: becoming Lena Hall

In “Your Friends and Neighbors,” Lena Hall’s character is also a musician.

Courtesy Apple TV
At a certain point you stop asking who people want you to be and start figuring out who you already are.
Lena Hall

There is a moment in conversation with actress and musician Lena Hall when the question of identity lands with unusual force.

“Well,” she said, pausing to consider it, “who am I really?”

Keep ReadingShow less
Remembering Todd Snider at The Colonial Theatre

“A Love Letter to Handsome John” screens at The Colonial Theatre on May 8.

Provided

Fans of the late singer-songwriter Todd Snider will have a rare opportunity to gather in celebration of his life and music when “A Love Letter to Handsome John,” a documentary by Otis Gibbs, screens for one night only at The Colonial Theatre in North Canaan on Friday, May 8.

Presented by Wilder House Berkshires and The Colonial Theatre, the 54-minute film began as a tribute to Snider’s friend and mentor, folk legend John Prine. Instead, following Snider’s death last November at age 59, it became something more intimate: a portrait of the alt-country pioneer during the final year of his life.

Keep ReadingShow less
google preferred source

Want more of our stories on Google? Click here to make us a Preferred Source.

google preferred source

Want more of our stories on Google? Click here to make us a Preferred Source.