Feeling Stuck? Small is manageable

Is it time to clear off your to-do list, the one that’s been sitting there untouched for days, weeks, months?

Often, the key to success is breaking down that list — and the individual items on that list — into smaller parts. There may be several factors that need to be addressed, but really there is only one exact next step that could be taken as a starting point. This next step needs to be small and doable.  

One client of mine had a to-do list that was 200 items long. I asked her what kind of progress she’d made on that list over the last two months. She said she’d been unable to do anything because it felt so overwhelming to even look at this humongous list.

I had her pick three tasks and make them her new to-do list. The rest would be “on file.† 

Then I asked her to choose one of those items. What, I asked, is the exact next step she needed to take?

She said that the screen on her cell phone was cracked and she needed a new one. It seemed simple enough, yet she hadn’t been able to move forward.

After some discussion, we were able to break that one item down into smaller, more manageable items. Specifically, she knew that what she actually needed to do first was call her friends and ask what plan they were on; she had been unhappy with her service plan and wanted advice on which plan to switch to.  

 So instead of making the to-do item “buy a new phone,†we broke it down  and made her first item: “call friends and ask what service they’re using.â€

Having a 200-item punch list sets up unreasonable expectations, and causes the brain to go into panic mode. When you panic, access to the cortex is temporarily shut down by the mid brain and we move into a mode of survival — making creative actions almost impossible. Any change we hope to make must be small enough to pass the midbrain threat test in order to make it to the cortex, where creative-action thoughts originate.

The next time you are feeling stuck, break your challenge down into the critical parts and identify the “exact next step.†Make it small and manageable —and remember that each person might have a different idea of what manageable means — and make a commitment to take that step within a week’s time.

Once you take that step, you start to build up that feeling of “I can do this,†and you’re on your way.

Brooke Loening is a life coach in Sharon who works with individuals, couples and families on achieving growth in career, health and relationships. For more information, visit theloeningplan.com.