About Redemption? Enduring Values? Not So Much

This movie, “Danny Collins,” is a cunningly disguised horror movie in which Al Pacino (in the title role) sings to Annette Bening (a Sen. Elizabeth Warren double).

Whoops. 

Sorry. 

Acid flashback.

“Danny Collins” is an alleged comedy-drama about a rock singer who has turned into a parody of himself, gets disgusted and tries to turn his life around by moving to a hotel in New Jersey.

Along the way he butts into the lives of his son Tom (Bobby Cannavale), whom he has never met; Tom’s wife Samantha (Jennifer Garner), who is pregnant; and their hyperactive daughter Sophie (Katerina Cas).

And he spends a lot of time trying to win over the hotel manager, Mary, who looks alarmingly like Senator Warren.

There is some comedy. Not much, but a bit — especially during Danny’s Vegas-style shows.

There is also some drama, centering around a letter from John Lennon to Danny in 1971. 

If Danny had received this letter in a timely fashion, he might not be the overripe piece of cheese he is.

But he didn’t.

It wasn’t the post office’s fault, either. The letter went to a rock journalist, who kept it, hoping to cash in.

But the journo sold the letter to a collector of Lennon memorabilia. Then he died.

As a vehicle for a 74-year-old screen icon, “Danny Collins” is not nearly as hideous as “Last Vegas,” in which Michael Douglas (age 70), Robert De Niro (71), Morgan Freeman (77) and Kevin Kline (67) allowed themselves to be put in “Girls Gone Wild” situations. (Hilarity was supposed to ensue. It did not.)

But as a movie ostensibly about redemption and enduring values, this flick falls short.

The story is built along whack-a-mole lines — get the kid’s ADHD squared away and wham — somebody else has a rare form of leukemia.

Good thing Danny’s rich. 

Wait, here’s a chance for some more drama. Seems Danny’s not as rich as he thought.

The pivotal scene is when Danny sings the snippet of song — the first thing he’s written in 30 years! — to Mary, who scrunches up her face as if thinking up a real zinger for the chairman of Goldman Sachs.

This is actually Al Pacino singing. It has to be. Nobody would deliberately sound like a dying walrus.

Pacing the entire wretched production are songs by John Lennon, chosen for dramatic effect. 

Thus “Whatever Gets You Through the Night” plays through the party scene, “Working Class Hero” as Danny glumly contemplates his sumptuous house and 20-something fiancée, and “Cold Turkey” accompanies the shots of twisted sheets and empty booze bottles. (“Can’t Buy Me Love” would have been appropriate too, but that was one of Paul McCartney’s, and Paul didn’t write Danny a letter.)

On the plus side, Pacino does a good lounge lizard impersonation.

And his jacket, pocket square, paper napkins and cell phone cover match.

First time director Dan Fogelman wrote the screenplay for “Danny Collins.” 

He also wrote “Last Vegas.”

So if you liked that, you’ll probably like this.

Maybe, with time, Fogelman will find a way to write about elderly people without making them seem ridiculous.

“Danny Collins” is rated R for language, drug use and nudity.

It is playing widely.