The garden is dead, long live the garden

Bowman’s Root in Page Dickey’s garden.
Dee Salomon
Bowman’s Root in Page Dickey’s garden.
It is indisputable that we are moving toward a new garden aesthetic. I would even go one step further to propose that gardening’s "man over nature" ethos — which has a classic exemplar in the formal gardens of Versailles — is now over. Nature reminds us, with greater frequency and intensity, that she is in control, and we are beginning to come to terms with the reality that it is a fool’s game to try to tame her.
As you think about your spring planting plans, slide into a new mindset. Let’s call it "human abetting nature." This mindset finds beauty less in rigorous planting schemes and more in the creation of habitats. The aesthetic associated with this new mindset is, thankfully, more forgiving — not so much the baggy dress to the tailored suit, but a looser beauty that can still be shaped or contained in ways we find pleasing.
As with many of our choices these days, mindfulness is the first step. Where are you planting?
And what are you planting there? When planting at the edge of the woods and in her fields, writer and garden designer Page Dickey will only plant natives. Here she has incorporated American hornbeam, Carpinus caroliniana, redbud, Cercis canadensis and gray dogwood, Cornus racemosa. In her book "Uprooted," Dickey writes about her experience moving from a home where she crafted and tended an intricate garden to her current home in Falls Village with acres of woodland, fields and fen. Instead of working to transform the land into something else, she now listens to the land and responds to nurture it.
This new mindset does not mean that aesthetics are less important than before; rather, the aesthetic has shifted. In Dickey’s garden beds that surround her house, she mixes non-natives with native perennials, such as her favorite Bowman’s Root, Gillenia trifoliata (The Cornwall Garden Club native plant sale will offer Bowman’s Root plants among other native perennials Saturday, May 25, in West Cornwall. cornwallgardenclub.org)
Among Dickey’s favorite native shrubs are Fothergilla, Clethra alnifolia, gray dogwood, Cornus racemosa, and the American cranberrybush viburnum, Viburnum trilobum. She also used Viburnum lentago, called nannyberry, in place of adding more lilac, that had originally tempted her, for a hedgerow along a rough track on her property. From "Uprooted": “Surely I could plant something with more to offer, a plant that would enrich our wild habitat.” I can attest to the beauty of this native tree which grows at the edges of our marsh. It can get as tall as 15 feet and has a wide spread if given the space and light. Flowers in spring, nutritious berries for birds in fall.
Deborah Munson is one of our area’s top horticulturalists and landscape designers, who happily admits that her approach to garden design changed over the past decade: “In an ecologically driven garden/landscape I love a wilder and much freer style where there is little to no delineation between the wild and cultivated landscape and incorporating natives as often as possible; a landscape that over time can find its own way, being nudged occasionally by the human hand, often planted to allow the plants to drive the design, allowing self-sowing and covering ground.” One of her favorite native plant combinations is “shadblow, Amelanchier arborea underplanted with our native foam flower, Tiarella cordifolia and miterwort, Michella diphylla is a favorite combo. Add some snowdrops and white daffodils if you’re not a ‘native only’ purist.”
Out with precision edging. Out with yards of trucked-in mulch covered beds: “We can often create our own mulch on site by composting leaves and other garden debris as well as using plants as a living mulch. One should be aware that trucking in products can often bring new diseases and pests.”
Key to our new mindset, Munson reminds us, is "learning about a plant’s behavior… i.e. invasives (don’t plant) or colonizers (be careful what you ask for.) Is it a generalist, a plant that will grow almost any condition or specialist; for example, a plant that will only grow in wetlands or only in well drained acidic conditions?”
Many of Dickey's and Munson’s favorite native plants — from Redbud to Shadblow to Clethra, Sweet Fern, Viburnum Lentago and Anenome Canadensis — will be available from the Northwest Conservation District annual plant sale. You can preorder at nwcd.org and attend April 19-21 at Goshen fairground.
More on spring plant selection in next month’s column. If you have any questions regarding spring planting, please send them to dee@theungardener.com
Dee Salomon “ungardens” in Litchfield County.
SALISBURY — Amanda Cannon, age 100, passed away Oct. 15, 2025, at Noble Horizons. She was the wife of the late Jeremiah Cannon.
Amanda was born Aug. 20, 1925, in Brooklyn, New York the daughter of the late Karl and Ella Husslein.
She was widowed at the age of 31 and worked as a bookkeeper for the Standard Oil Company and other oil companies in New York City until she retired at age 72.
Amanda moved to Noble Horizons in 2013 to live near her daughter Diane and son-in-law (the late) Raymond Zelazny.
She enjoyed her time in the Northwest Corner and was an avid nature lover, albeit considered herself a native New Yorker as she was born and resided in NYC for 88 years.
She was a faithful parishioner of St. Mary’s Church in Lakeville and attended Mass regularly until the age of 99.
Amanda was the grandmother of (the late) Jesse Morse and is survived by her daughter, Diane Zelazny, her grandsons, Adam Morse, Raymond Morse and his wife Daron and their daughter and her great granddaughter Cecelia Morse.
A Mass of Christian Burial will take place on Thursday, Oct. 23, 11 a.m. at St Mary’s Church in Lakeville, Connecticut.
Memorial donations may be made to St. Mary’s Church.
The Kenny Funeral Home has care of arrangements.
LAKEVILLE — Barbara Meyers DelPrete, 84, passed away Tuesday, Sept. 30, 2025, at her home. She was the beloved wife of George R. DelPrete for 62 years.
Mrs. DelPrete was born in Burlington, Iowa, on May 31, 1941, daughter of the late George and Judy Meyers. She lived in California for a time and had been a Lakeville resident for the past 55 years.
Survivors, in addition to her husband, George, include son, George R. DelPrete II, daughter, Jena DelPrete Allee, and son Stephen P. DelPrete. Grandchildren; Trey, Cassidy, and Meredith DelPrete, Jack, Will and Finn Allee, and Ali and Nicholas DelPrete.
A Funeral Mass was held at St. Mary’s Church, Lakeville, on Saturday, Oct. 4. May she Rest in Peace.
Ryan Funeral Home, 255 Main St., Lakeville, is in care of arrangements.
To offer an online condolence, please visit ryanfhct.com
SHARON — Shirley Anne Wilbur Perotti, daughter of George and Mabel (Johnson) Wilbur, the first girl born into the Wilbur family in 65 years, passed away on Oct. 5, 2025, at Noble Horizons.
Shirley was born on Aug. 19, 1948 at Sharon Hospital.
She was raised on her parents’ poultry farm (Odge’s Eggs, Inc.).
After graduating from Housatonic Valley Regional High School, she worked at Litchfield County National Bank and Colonial Bank.
She married the love of her life, John, on Aug. 16, 1969, and they lived on Sharon Mountain for more than 50 years.
Shirley enjoyed creating the annual family Christmas card, which was a coveted keepsake.She also enjoyed having lunch once a month with her best friends, Betty Kowalski, Kathy Ducillo, and Paula Weir.
In addition to John, she is survived by her three children and their families; Sarah Medeiros, her husband, Geoff, and their sons, Nick and Andrew, of Longmeadow, Massachusetts, Shelby Diorio, her husband, Mike, and their daughters, Addie, Lainey and Lyla, of East Canaan, Connecticut,Jeffrey Perotti, his wife, Melissa, and their daughters, Annie, Lucy and Winnie, of East Canaan. Shirley also leaves her two brothers, Edward Wilbur and his wife Joan, and David Wilbur; two nieces, three nephews, and several cousins.
At Shirley’s request, services will be private.
Donations in her memory may be made to the Sharon Woman’s Club Scholarship Fund, PO Box 283, Sharon, CT 06069.
The Kenny Funeral Home has care of arrangements.
MILLERTON — Veronica Lee “Ronnie” Silvernale, 78, a lifelong area resident died Tuesday, Oct. 7, 2025, at Sharon Hospital in Sharon, Connecticut. Mrs. Silvernale had a long career at Noble Horizons in Salisbury, where she served as a respected team leader in housekeeping and laundry services for over eighteen years. She retired in 2012.
Born Oct. 19, 1946, at Camp Lejeune, North Carolina, she was the daughter of the late Bradley C. and Sophie (Debrew) Hosier, Sr. Following her graduation from high school and attending college, she married Jack Gerard Silvernale on June 15, 1983 in Millerton, New York. Their marriage lasted thirty-five years until Jack’s passing on July 28, 2018.
Ronnie is survived by her daughter, Jaime Silvernale (Wm. MacDaniel, Sr.) of Millerton, her beloved grandson, Wm. MacDaniel, Jr.; two special nieces, Shannon and Rebecca and a special nephew Sean Hosier. In addition to her parents and husband, she was predeceased by her brother, Bradley C. Hosier, Jr. and her dear friend Ruth Fullerton of Millerton.
Visitation was private. A celebration of Ronnie’s life will be held in the future. Arrangements have been entrusted to the Scott D. Conklin Funeral Home, 37 Park Avenue, Millerton, NY 12546. To send an online condolence to the family or to plant a tree in Ronnie’s memory, please visit www.conklinfuneralhome.com