We gather together: A homeless family’s story

Cristina and Kayla Garcia shared their story with The Lakeville Journal Nov. 19.

Jennifer Almquist

We gather together: A homeless family’s story

Here in the Northwest Corner of Connecticut, where the first frost comes early, and black bears hibernate, the woods are inhabited by hundreds of people sleeping rough.

There has been a 14% rise in homelessness in Connecticut since 2022. There are now 482 “people in need of homeless response systems”, according to Connecticut Coordinated Access Network (CAN), many of them senior citizens.

Cristina and Ricardo Garcia asked a simple question, “Why is there no place in the world for us?”

The Garcias, with their 22-year-old daughter Kayla, are a family who spend each night sleeping in a tent city in Waterbury. They take a bus in the morning to the Gathering Place in Torrington for warmth and showers, then eat their meals together at the Community Soup Kitchen in town. Their fierce desire to stay together as a family has its genesis in years of suffering, deprivation, substance abuse, prison, and escape.

Family is all that matters to them. It is all they have.

“My daughter is shy, so speak quietly to her,” Cristina whispered, explaining further that Kayla and her sister Jessica, who is 18, are on the autism spectrum. Cristina and her girls escaped years ago from her abusive husband. Her girls were then taken from her when they were 12 and 14. Cristina, who has been clean for two years, suffered from substance use disorder. It has been six years since Cristina has seen Jessica.

Her daughter Kayla, her long braids tucked under a watch cap, was wearing headphones to mask out loud shouts of men heatedly discussing the mistreatment of criminals. Kayla’s expressive brown eyes gave away her discomfort. The homeless resource center was packed with women and men in from the November cold; some on cellphones, some waiting with their towels for a warm shower, others quietly sipping hot coffee.

The Gathering Place in Torrington is a daytime drop-in center for the 482 homeless neighbors who live in Litchfield County, Connecticut. The food pantry at Friends in Service to Humanity (FISH) in Torrington serves more than 2,000 people.

There are currently 51 shelter beds in Northwest Connecticut: 16 in Winsted and 35 in Torrington with 5 restricted to veterans. As of today, there will be 30 overflow shelter beds for the winter season.

Cristina Garcia, left, working at the Community Soup Kitchen in Torrington.Jennifer Almquist

At the Community Soup Kitchen in Torrington’s Trinity Episcopal Church Nov. 19, Cristina folded her family’s laundry on the table she had just cleared from the breakfast crowd. She paused to talk and reflect on her difficult journey.

Cristina Garcia:My husband Ricky just started working. He’ll be coming home with literally $72. a week. Sometimes I feel like no one cares. We’ve been clean for two years. We’ve had our ups and downs with our kids. My adoptive mom passed away and my dad passed away in a housefire. So, I don’t have any family. I had an abusive relationship basically, which I escaped with my daughters because it was very bad. My new husband Ricky and I met here, and we’ve been together for almost four years. Because of my earlier situation, my kids were taken from me.

Jennifer Almquist:How old were they when they were taken from you?

CG: They were taken away for six years when Kayla was 14.

JA:During that time were you allowed to have any communication, or hear how the girls were doing?

CG:Like I said, I was in an abusive relationship, and he was in charge. Kayla came back to me last January. It was rough. It is hard when you have no family, nothing to fall back on. Family is just me, my husband and my kids. Now there’s the Gathering Place, and the soup kitchen people that I consider family. They open their arms to us and have been very good, very kind to us.

JA:Did you have housing at some point?

CG:I did, but I lost my housing voucher because I was out of the household for over 20 days. I was incarcerated due to charges from five years ago. I was legally married, but they wouldn’t take in consideration the impact on the girls. The rent was still being paid - it was still being paid the whole time but they took the voucher away. So now it’s like, “do you have a lawyer - somebody to step forward?” Nobody comes forward. We didn’t appeal. We lost everything, so altogether we’ve been out on the street since I got out, so in and out, trying to keep the apartment, but we got notice from the city to quit the apartment, so now we’re on the streets.

JA: Do the charges on your record mean you have to start all over again to get a housing voucher?

CG: We’re just hoping for another voucher.

JA:Is that a lot of pressure when you are trying to stay straight?

CG:It is great to keep my mind straight by volunteering at the Soup Kitchen. When we first started coming here, my husband and I kept telling the boss DJ, if you guys need help, just let us know. You’re helping us out by giving us breakfast, giving us lunch. Suddenly one day the foundation that helps them provide the food wanted to interview somebody that was coming here. Someone that could explain to them the impacts, and how welcoming it is here. They interviewed me, and since that day I’ve been volunteering here. I basically go to the Gathering Place in the morning, take the shower and do laundry, come straight here by 9:30. From that time until around 2:30 I work in the kitchen and prep and serve food. I like it because it’s community. I love being here just because they are so kind to us. My daughter has a hard time talking to new people or getting to know new people. She has a close relationship with someone here now.

JA: What was her living situation when you weren’t with her?

CG: Kayla and Jessica were in foster care. I had no access to anything. Now it’s like starting all new, trying to apply for Social Security, Kayla’s been denied numerous times, and getting a copy of her birth certificate is expensive. That’s what I’m going through right now. She needs help. They say “we can’t help” because they don’t think she has that many issues because she doesn’t hear voices, and she’s not, in their minds, crazy like other people. Kayla does have mental health issues. Jessica didn’t start talking until she was six. It’s just sad that people don’t take in consideration what the impact of situations like being in foster care, or being homeless, are on kids. Especially if you’re a sensitive kid. Kayla is 22 but her mentality sometimes isn’t like her age.

JA: How does Kayla do with the sleeping arrangements and the cold?

CG: No, it’s horrible. All you just have is a tent in the world. People take your stuff; you can’t trust anybody -that’s just how it is. We have a small U-Haul as a storage unit that is expensive. We had to get rid of most of our stuff. It’s just hard, really hard especially with the holidays coming up.

JA: How do you three get warm in your tent?

CG:We layer up with four blankets on, then jackets and sleeping bags. Ricky puts a wooden pallet under the tent, but it’s like sleeping on the floor.

JA: What are you doing for Thanksgiving?

CG:The soup kitchen is not open on Thanksgiving. When you’re homeless you don’t get a break, you don’t get time, the days are endless. Holidays are just another day, not like anything special. We can’t plan anything. We have no way to cook anything. Every day in the woods, it’s just eating out of cans. We may not be able to have a Thanksgiving feast this year, but for Christmas, for my kids and my step kids, there’s no hope of getting them something special. Sometimes I just feel like I’m screwed. I just feel like as much as I try, it’s like I’m trying for what is not possible. It’s hard to keep hoping. These holiday times hurt the most. This is our first holiday back together in six years now that she’s back with us. I want am waiting until my youngest is 21 and graduates this June. For her to be allowed to come home, I must have housing. I feel like it might be a lot to ask, but I just want my family back together.

JA:What are you grateful for?

CG: Kayla loves her stepdad, and he’s very good to us. He walks up the mountain to work at Target. He walks because he can’t drive. We want to get him a bike. Hopefully by December the warming center will reopen. Lori at the Gathering Place helps us so much. She’s an amazing person. I had open heart surgery. They put in a pacemaker that needs replacing, but they can’t do the surgery and then discharge me to the street, so my surgery is being put off. I have seizures, so I need a calm setting. I’m grateful for Lori because she watches out for us. I have met amazing people through her, like the people in this kitchen, for DJ and Bill, and the opportunity to give back, you know. It’s important because I want to make sure I stay on track with my sobriety. Being around positive people helps me. I am trying not to cry. I want to have everyone together for Thanksgiving.

Latest News

Stephen S. Myers

LAKEVILLE — Stephen S. Myers, 82, of Lakeville, (formerly of New York City, Almond, New York, Kane’ohe, Hawaii, and Fair Oaks, California) passed away peacefully at his home on Nov. 30, 2024. He is survived by his wife Elizabeth “Betsy” (Phelan), his two sons Matthew and Shepherd, two nephews and three nieces.

Stephen was born in Elmhurst, Illinois, on Oct. 29, 1942, the son of the late Elwood Mosman and Donnie Marguerite Myers. Growing up in Glen Ellyn, Illinois, Stephen struggled with dyslexia in multiple high schools, ultimately graduating from Avon Old Farms High School in Avon, Connecticut.

Keep ReadingShow less
Ella L. Clark

WEST CORNWALL — Ella L. Clark, 83, a social worker, writer, and lover of nature and the Post Office, died Nov. 7, 2024 at Vassar Brothers Hospital in Poughkeepsie, after an acute stroke. Her family was with her in her last week.

Ella was predeceased by her parents, Benjamin S. and Charlotte L. Clark, her brother, Benjamin Clark, and her sister Tib Clark. Ella is survived by her daughter, Cristina Mathews of Fort Bragg, California, and her husband Jason and son Milo, her son Alexander Mathews, of Newton, Massachusetts, and his wife Olivia and children Ariana, Damian, and Torey, her daughter Jessica Meyer, of Pacific Palisades, California, and her husband Tim and children Ione and Nikos; and her sister Charlotte de Bresson of Paris.

Keep ReadingShow less
David Graeme Townsend

SALISBURY — David Graeme Townsend was born July 23, 1930, in Mineola, New York, to Rachel Townsend (Maxtone-Graham) and Greenough Townsend. David and his older brother Antone grew up in New York City and Long Island. Some of his early life was spent in Scotland in his mother’s family home, Cultoquhey, which is near Perth in the Highlands. Here he enjoyed summers with all his Maxtone-Graham cousins. Many of these cousins would remain close with David for his entire life. One cousin, Charles Smythe, even came to America to live with David and his family during the war where Charles became like a brother to David and Antone. David went to St. George’s in Newport, Rhode Island for a while and then on to Lawrenceville in New Jersey. He finished high school at the Basil Patterson School in Edinburgh, Scotland.

Immediately after high school, David enrolled in the US Marine Corps and served two tours in the Korean War. He was always very proud of his military service. After his service David attended the Sorbonne University in Paris for two years and then the University of Madrid for one year. Even though David never finished his formal education, he always remained an avid student of history and language. In his travels his skill with foreign languages was sometimes a problem because he spoke with such a good accent that it was sometimes falsely assumed that he was fluent.

Keep ReadingShow less
Richard George Ralph

EAST CANAAN — Richard George Ralph, 84, a beloved father, grandfather, and friend, passed away peacefully on Dec. 4, 2024, at his home in East Canaan, surrounded by his family. Born on Sept. 23, 1940, in Cornwall, Connecticut, he was the son of the late Marie (Kennedy) Ralph Negri and George Yeaton Ralph Jr.

Richard was the proud owner and operator of Richard Ralph and Son Rubbish Removal for many years. Known for his strong work ethic and reliability, he built a trusted business that served the community. After his retirement, his son Richard took over the reins, continuing the family tradition. Richard’s friendly demeanor meant that there weren’t many in the area who didn’t know him, and all were met with warm greetings and hearty waves.

Keep ReadingShow less