Upstairs or downstairs? Where do you see yourself?

Yes, we’ve succumbed. And that is not the royal “we,” even though we are referring to a British subject. The “we” is me, and pretty much everyone I know, and what we’ve succumbed to is the latest drawing room drama from the BBC, “Downton Abbey.”Who is not talking about it? The New York Times reported that people are having British-themed viewing parties. It seems to be a common reaction to a primetime British event; when Prince William wed Kate Middleton, the papers were filled with similar stories — any excuse to don a tiara. But what I want to know is, where do you see yourself? Upstairs or downstairs? Do you identify with the help? Or with the upper crust? Are you swanning about for Mr. Bates, the valet, that bastion of male rectitude? He can be seen as the bad boy in need of redemption (he has a criminal record), the strong silent type, who will be fearless and faithful; the misguided moralist. Or do you fancy Thomas? The character we love to hate, but with a twist. He’s a tortured soul. You see he’s gay, but he works downstairs and has probably never heard of Bloomsbury or Oscar Wilde. But he’s lucky; some among the staff recognize that he’s “different” and don’t hold it against him. Of course, for his part he’s not entirely sure whether he’s madder at the world for its sexual inhibitions or at the entrenched class system that makes it difficult to get ahead.Perhaps you envision yourself taking a seat in the dining room alongside Lord Grantham; note that counter to the American custom, the Lord of the manor does not sit at the head of the table.Most people’s first choice would be for the upstairs. It looks like a nice life — beautiful house, gorgeous grounds and servants to anticipate your every need, want and desire. But consider this: When you live upstairs you can get a cup of tea (that all-purpose British band-aid), but you have to ring for it; you can’t just go into the kitchen and make yourself a pot. Consider how comforting that small act actually is.If you live upstairs, there is nearly always a servant in the room with you. When you are dining — if you are having a meal that someone in livery has served you from the left, then you are dining, not eating — someone is standing silently at attention. Do you think they are deaf? Do you think your conversation is not of interest? There is nowhere you can go without someone observing you. No privacy, no boundaries. Not even the bathroom; after the maid runs the bath she’ll hang around to hand you the soap. However, it’s not OK for the family to wander around their own house. Servants’ quarters are off limits, even as the servants come and go from the family’s rooms.Talk about a class system meant to control and confine. One would almost hope to be part of the downstairs crew rather than the daughter of an Earl. Since he didn’t sire a son, the entire estate, title and inheritance will pass to whichever male heir they can dredge up, no matter how far down the line. The unlucky daughters of the Earl have only their looks and wits to see them through.It is possible to pity those privileged young women. They are unable to inherit because of the centuries-old right of primogeniture and entail. Their best bet is to marry well, but the pool they’re picking from is limited by the same class restraints they were born into. Turns out marrying for money isn’t that easy. The heart has a tendency to get in the way. And if Lady Mary doesn’t find herself a rich husband, she has no marketable skill to fall back on. An argument can be made that the downstairs maids actually have more social mobility than Mary. At least, they have upward mobility. Marry the valet, leave service and open up a small inn in a sweet little village. That’s Anna’s dream. It seems like it might be possible.What do Anna, Mary and all of us really want? We want to wander upstairs and downstairs at will. We want freedom of mobility. Tara Kelly, copy editor at The Lakeville Journal, is an avid follower of social trends. She may be reached at tarakny@earthlink.net.

Latest News

Wake Robin Inn sold after nearly two years of land-use battles

The Wake Robin Inn in Lakeville has been sold for $3.5 million following nearly two years of land-use disputes and litigation over its proposed redevelopment.

Photo courtesy of Houlihan Lawrence Commercial Real Estate

LAKEVILLE — The Wake Robin Inn, the historic country property at the center of a contentious land-use battle for nearly two years, has been sold for $3.5 million.

The 11.52-acre hilltop property was purchased by Aradev LLC, a hospitality investment firm planning a major redevelopment of the 15,800-square-foot inn. The sale was announced Friday by Houlihan Lawrence Commercial, which represented the seller, Wake Robin LLC.

Keep ReadingShow less
Kent commission tackles Lane Street zoning snag
Lane Street warehouse conversion raises zoning concerns in Kent
By Alec Linden

KENT — The Planning and Zoning Commission is working to untangle a long-standing zoning complication affecting John and Diane Degnan’s Lane Street property as the couple seeks approval to convert an old warehouse into a residence and establish a four-unit rental building at the front of the site.

During the commission’s Feb. 12 meeting, Planning and Zoning attorney Michael Ziska described the situation as a “quagmire,” tracing the issue to a variance granted by the Zoning Board of Appeals roughly 45 years ago that has complicated the property’s use ever since.

Keep ReadingShow less
Kent P&Z closes High Watch hearing, continues deliberations

Kent Town Hall, where the Planning and Zoning Commission closed a public hearing on High Watch Recovery Center’s permit modification request on Feb. 12

Leila Hawken

KENT — The Planning and Zoning Commission on Feb. 12 closed a long-running public hearing on High Watch Recovery Center’s application to modify its special permit and will continue deliberations at its March meeting.

The application seeks to amend several conditions attached to the addiction treatment facility’s original 2019 permit. High Watch CEO Andrew Roberts, who first presented the proposal to P&Z in November, said the changes are intended to address issues stemming from what he described during last week's hearing as “clumsily written conditions.”

Keep ReadingShow less
google preferred source

Want more of our stories on Google? Click here to make us a Preferred Source.

Kent committee to review Swift House options

The Swift House in Kent has been closed to the public since the COVID-19 pandemic. A newly appointed town committee will review renovation costs and future options for the historic property.

Alec Linden

KENT — Town officials have formed a seven-member committee to determine the future of the shuttered, town-owned Swift House, launching what could become a pivotal decision about whether Kent should invest in the historic property — or divest from it altogether.

The Board of Selectmen made the appointments on Wednesday, Feb. 11, following recent budget discussions in which the building’s costs and long-term viability were raised.

Keep ReadingShow less

Kathleen Rosier

Kathleen Rosier

CANAAN — Kathleen Rosier, 92, of Ashley Falls Massachusetts, passed away peacefully with her children at her bedside on Feb. 5, at Fairview Commons Nursing Home in Great Barrington, Massachusetts.

Kathleen was born on Oct. 31,1933, in East Canaan to Carlton and Carrie Nott.

Keep ReadingShow less

Carolyn G. McCarthy

Carolyn G. McCarthy

LAKEVILLE — Carolyn G. McCarthy, 88, a long time resident of Indian Mountain Road, passed away peacefully at home on Feb. 7, 2026.

She was born on Sept. 8, 1937, in Hollis, New York. She was the youngest daughter of the late William James and Ruth Anderson Gedge of Indian Mountain Road.

Keep ReadingShow less
google preferred source

Want more of our stories on Google? Click here to make us a Preferred Source.

google preferred source

Want more of our stories on Google? Click here to make us a Preferred Source.